I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
