Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Text me some of your sweat
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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