Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
