Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
