so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
wow bdsm is so cute
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
