you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
