haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
