I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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