I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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