I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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