i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Drake has all the answers
Randomize
