But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
