Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
