So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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