Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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