i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
