What a fucking waste of an outfit
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
