We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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