bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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