thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
