Need sex. Gaining weight.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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