Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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