I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
