people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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