I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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