Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize