If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
