Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
