It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
