Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
