You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
you would pick up someone in the library
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
