when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
