The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
