We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize