Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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