There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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