what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize