well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Randomize
