It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
