There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
