i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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