Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
