just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize