I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
i out mim tonsoeep
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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