spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
