Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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