i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
