i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
