quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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