walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
